Where did my Lifestyle Design Project go wrong?
Laws of Physics
When I stopped being my own change agent. Ralph Carlson Blog is not theory or hype. It documents me as a lab rat in my own lifestyle design project. I just want to share how I’m doing with my outrageous retirement lifestyle. I reveal the highs and lows of my life, share lessons learned and relearned along the way and sometimes confess about missteps and problems. Human beings aren’t perfect and I am very human. Those clear plans and agendas which lay out all the necessary steps in a clear logical fashion are very nice but implementation is never easy. The details get messy.
Lately I have lost momentum. What was exciting six months ago now seems routine. Lately I struggle maintaining focus and resolve. I fritter time away on trivial activities and feel less commitment to my goals. I question my resolve and consider lowering my expectations. I forgot my lifestyle design project. I stopped being a change agent.
I am slacking off.
Strangely, this doesn’t make me angry. I view the process distantly and clinically. I don’t understand. Why, I ask myself, was I able to do so much just a year ago and now seem to be stuck in place. Where has my drive and determination gone? And what can I do to fix it?
Well, I discovered the problem……
it’s me!
I’ve been a student of leadership and self-improvement for years now. Gradually I accepted that I can learn new skills, change my behaviors and become a person quite different from who I thought I was born to be. It wasn’t easy or comfortable. But it was satisfying, even exciting. Each new discovery and insight spurred me on. I accepted responsibility. I studied leaders. I nurtured my skills and abilities and worked to develop some new ones. I became a change agent. I saw some results, I got excited……
And then I coasted. My Lifestyle design Project crashed.
In the real world, momentum doesn’t last. The laws of physics say that a body in motion stays in motion and a body at rest stays at rest. Unfortunately the real world is more complicated than a theoretical one. An atmosphere complicates theory by adding resistance which slows down forward movement. It is the same with your attitude. Without a positive attitude good habits and resolve weaken over time. Without reinforcement and feedback the old bad ones regain control/.
Fixing your attitude and enthusiasm works like physics. Your change momentum slows because there are so many negative influences affecting you. It takes effort to overcome the passivity that most people accept. Staying engaged requires continued commitment and if you slack off or rest on your laurels you slip backward.
My development was a result of a structured program. Reading books and listening to audios helped me understand leadership and relationships; associations with people who share my life goals supported my growth. I respected the process and appreciated the results but I missed one important lesson. I thought that my hard won progress was permanent. I believed that I could relax my learning and keep the results. I stopped my commitment to the program because I thought that I was a finished product and didn’t need more training. I drifted and that brought me to where I am today – frustrated and stalled.
Back to the basics.
What snapped me out of my funk was a return to the program. Listening to an audio the other day, I was reminded about the steps required for exceptional accomplishments in life: an ambitious goal that has you emotionally engaged a training program for personal development and a plan to make that goal a reality. Success isn’t random or the result of accidents. It comes from commitment, planning and disciplined effort. I had stopped working all three parts of this program and as a result, I was drifting.
Never get full of yourself! This is all I want to communicate in this post. I hope that this may provide encouragement to others who may be frustrated with their progress and may have made the same mistake. The reality is that everyone whether they are proven successes or just getting started can have their progress stopped by pride and overconfidence. If you begin to think- like I did- that you have it all under control; that you have mastered the skills to carry you to success you are doomed to fail. There is always something more to learn. There is always another human failing to overcome. There is always work required to stay on course. So stay the course when you commit to an outrageous goal. Don’t ever assume that you know all you need to know. Stay humble, stay teachable and find a mentor who can tell you when you go off course. Don’t assume that your lifestyle design project can operate on automatic pilot. Don’t ever stop being a change agent in your life.
