If I had it to do over?

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Lifestyle Question

Bill Birnbaum is a blogger who sees his life as an adventure. I like reading about his adventures because they inspire me to think more creatively about using the time I have left. Yesterday he asked a question and I’m still thinking about it. Now that it’s really too late to choose a new career, what would I like to do if I could start all over. It is really an infectious idea because in your mind, you can eliminate all the realities and think about the high points. It can be a bummer though to think about your youthful dreams and then remember the mundane life you settled for. At least that’s how it seems to me.

My fantasy 

My lifestyle fantasy has always been to be an opera singer. Despite a B quality voice, I always loved singing and life performing opera combined all the lifestyle fantasies of my youth. There was travel, pleasing an audience and a small component of fame. Looking deeper into the lifestyle of an opera singer, I’m sure that there are downsides. It is probably a feast or famine business, especially at the beginning. There is also the issue of keeping your instrument in perfect condition and avoiding illnesses. Still many people manage those issues and I have no doubt that with the voice and the presence, lifestyle would be manageable.

Realistically, I never had a chance at that career. A voice is a gift and a mediocre one cannot be overcome by training or discipline. The best I could anticipate would be participation in a choir or community theater.

So what did I choose? 

Looking back, I really didn’t make a career choice. I dithered and drifted. I would never have imagined the job I held for most of my career. I suspect that this is true for many people. A path appears and leads into things completely unanticipated. I can’t complain because I loved that job most of the time. What I regret is the reality I was forced to recognize during the few years where I hated that job. What was the difference? For most of my career, I was free to set my own course. I was an employee but no body cared how I did it. I did what was required in my own way and my bosses were happy that it made them look good. It’s the way work and employment should be. The years I hated were when my boss had an agenda. It wasn’t so much following someone else s agenda as receiving no support when I did. I would do what my boss wanted but my boss did not deliver the support to get it approved and would not protect me from antagonistic rival functions. I learned too late that an employee is ultimately powerless.

I had always been dismissive of managers. What I valued was doing things and solving problems. I never understood or appreciated the skill and value of someone who could organize and use creative people (and uncreative but dedicated people) to make extraordinary things happen. I wanted to be the inventor or the creative genius thinking that creativity was the highest level an individual could reach.

That was then.  This is now. 

Looking back now I see it differently. The world is full of creative people but it isn’t enough to be creative. If that creativity is to have value, it needs to be seen and appreciated. Having a wonderful voice and a great stage presence is worthless without an opera company to provide the matrix in which it has value. Starting over, I would look at opportunities to provide that matrix of meaning.

Still, my biggest complaint over my career was that ultimately, an employee is at the mercy of management which can turn on a dime from supportive to destructive. There isn’t any thing you can do about it. So, in the end, I have to say that I would like to take my young self aside and suggest becoming an entrepreneur. It was the farthest thing from my mind and it wasn’t something that came up when you planned your career. Even getting my MBA, when the word come up, it always had quotation marks around it. It was only for the odd ducks and wasn’t part of the curriculum. It wouldn’t have mattered at the time. I wasn’t interested. But I should have been.

But what if? 

Now, trying to answer Bills question, I wonder what might have been.

If this question interests you, please share your thinking. And drop by Bill’s place and let him know too.